‘At Least You’re Young Enough to Start Again’: What Not to Say to a Friend Getting Divorced at Thirty
‘It Paints My Sexuality as a Phase’: Why I’ve Always Found ‘Barsexuality’ Troubling as a Bisexual Woman
‘Barsexuality’ is a term that should have stayed on 2010 Tumblr, but I’ve been carrying it around like a cursed object since I was fifteen. Drunk on a Nalgene full of vodka, I’d confessed my love for the female drummer in my high school band. I had expected my ‘out’ friend Melanie to catch the secret and protect it fiercely, but there was apparently no secret to keep. I was barsexual not bisexual. I was Madison and Louise in Gilmore Girls, kissing each other so men would buy them drinks…
‘Bisexuality is About Attraction, Not Action’: Embracing Authenticity and Coming Out as a Bisexual Woman Marrying a Straight Man
In a world that often tries to confine individuals within predetermined boxes, the path to self-discovery and acceptance can be an emotionally charged journey. For bisexuals, embracing their true selves while in a relationship that doesn't align with societal expectations can be particularly challenging…
‘Representation Hugely Informs How We Come to Love’: Navigating a Second Adolescence After Coming Out as a Lesbian
Girls were not exposed to anything other than heterosexual relationships. My school library would not stock queer love stories for fear of corrupting students, depriving young queer people of a script. This was never something I consciously realised, but when you only see women being adored by macho heroes or knights in shining armor, there is a risk of falling into binarised traps and maybe even wanting to save distressed damsels!
Playing the ‘Feeld’: Getting on the Sex-Positive App and Opening Up My Marriage Last Year
We’re ethically non-monogamous. Keen to have fun with emotionally intelligent, kind humans. This is what my profile reads. I’m the most excited I’ve been in a long while about my sexuality. Having met my husband so young, we’ve only ever been with each other. Now there was the biggest, widest door open before us. I was so fucking ready…
Praise or Degradation? What Exploring My Kinks Has Taught Me About Sex and Relationships
Who would have thought that having to strive for academic perfection for about seven years gives you a praise kink? Or that reading toxic hate smut has you considering degradation? I’ve been hogtied (not for me; I don’t bend that way), and I’ve even had hot wax poured on me (that is for me)…
What I’ve Learned Dating Multiple Genders
It took me an entire lockdown to finally accept that I was not 100% straight. I put this revelation down to too much time alone with my thoughts. Lockdown crawled by. Eventually, I went back to university. In other words, to a big, anonymous city with thousands of young, cabin-fevered people within easy swiping access. I took the plunge and set my dating preferences to ‘everyone’…